Do I have to forgive someone to move on?
No, not necessarily, but it depends on what you mean by forgiveness and what you mean by "move on".
"Forgiveness" is often used to mean several different things: pretending the harm did not happen, dropping resentment, releasing revenge fantasies, restoring trust, reconciling, accepting an apology, or choosing not to bring the issue up again. Those are not the same. Some may be healthy. Some may be premature. Some may be irrational. If forgiveness means denying the facts, erasing justice, or granting unearned trust, then no, you do not need that to move on.
A more precise goal is integration. Moving on means accepting that the event happened, understanding its meaning, integrating it into your judgment of the person, setting whatever boundaries or consequences are appropriate, grieving what was lost, and no longer organizing your life around rumination, revenge, or the demand that the past be different. That is not forgetting. It is reality contact with less emotional captivity.
Psychologically, forgiveness can sometimes help people reduce resentment and distress, and forgiveness interventions have shown benefits in research. But that does not make forgiveness a moral duty or a substitute for judgment. You can have compassion for why someone acted destructively, understand their wounds or limitations, and still conclude: "This person is not safe.", "This person has not earned trust.", or "This relationship cannot continue in its previous form.".
The same distinction applies to apologies. A real apology names the wrong, accepts responsibility, and supports repair. It is not a ritual phrase that magically resets the relationship. Likewise, "I accept your apology." should not mean "Nothing happened.", "I trust you again.", or "There will be no consequences.". It can simply mean "I recognize that you are taking responsibility; now we will see whether repair occurs.".
A practical alternative to forced forgiveness is to name what happened, name what it means, decide what justice and safety require, allow the grief, and stop rehearsing the injury when rehearsal no longer serves understanding or action. If the situation involved abuse, trauma, coercion, or ongoing danger, prioritize safety and qualified support over any pressure to forgive. Do not perform forgiveness; live in truth, regain agency, and relate to the person—or their absence—according to the full context.